i dedicate this one to you

amplified, tranquilized..

baby maybe you need to get up and testify

recognize, picturize,

look through the fog with clearing eyes

that fantisized, mobilized..

words are what make you electrify

your platform..

and i must admit before i quit you were the driving force in my pit,

to make me more then yell..

i spit

reluctantly before i shit

all over these obstacles,

make you feel microscopic like a follicle

because the emotion in the inside was derrived from what...?

that shit sounds diabolical

deep down in the city in which i cant sleep

im clawing on the see through walls,

aha you read this and think im deep

but im shallow cause i scrape this off the top like its nothin

and every individual who tries to step to me,

there all talk.

bitch stop frontin

and start confrontin

because you be nothin

and i can laugh and point and

hallucinate without the joint..

because im not just bad

baby im somethin

so read a little more maybe get a bit entertained becacuse this

LADY not bitch,

is indispicable

and i am loosed from this held down weight,

and to no man whoom can be tamed.

i dedicate this one to you

all puns intended

rivers flowing,
bubble gum blowing
falling for bullshit without really knowing
yadda yadda..
blaw blaw blaw
he make you feel one way,
but forget it,
get raw.
get technical,
get secured
get ahead of being ahead
make him know youre more than sure
spoon fed,
leave your childish motem for dead
cause you grew a new skin

get familiar with that instead.

awaken the inner new tranquility..
because all he saying is blaw blaw blaw.

really
you feelin me?
do you really see
the partial pressures of over heated weather
where you feel to get wetter
especially cause you hearing me?
all puns intended.

a look into her eyes,

bonjour,
comme sa va?
spelled incorrectly?
let me..
be the first to say without a doubt..
you should let it be,
relentlessly skipping stones with chips that cause your trip..
to the point you need a joint to get you lifted feelin gifted..
take a trip
to a point that flows your center to the point which makes you better
into the eyes of a stress free girl who never knows..
which her failure which brings out her blows..
makes the blood running in her vains cold..
so now hold,
your hand out expecting be to dealt a deal..
in the only manner the girl with insufficient emotion could keep it real
because you never felt the weight of an unbalanced shoulder lean..

i guess a look into her eyes aint always serene?
do you get what i mean?
or did i ment meen,
as par to the median of what you can take..
in the instant your lips seperate and you yell
cause you took all you can take.
im crying.
because i miss that certain chapter..
where the tears that stream never existed..
cause the only recollection was laughter.

maybe you need a look into her eyes,

acid reflex.

water drops from my eyes,
but i cannot call these tears,
because i do not feel the usual sadness all i feel is fear
because im done here
and ive seen here
and i want to leave but im trapped here
and i cant find an answer to this question
and i look and toss and turn in this dessert,
i cannot recollect recollections
and im stumped as to what im feeling
what drug was my dealer dealing because these hallucinates
have me floating in a nightmare,
in which the kiss that woke me into dreams,
only provoke a deeper scare
happieness is never where it seems
and im drowning where i was once floating,
and i couldnt tell you where im going
because im writing for no reason
you see love rots like an apple,
ripe for a season,
until it eventually happens,
maybe it doesnt for some or few,
but all im trying to discover was this nightmare,
and why my nightmare was you,

the deeper you tried to love
the more scared i had become,
and the longer you took to prove it,
the tighter hold i had on a triggared gun,
but if the truggar was pulled...

what am i holding onto,
empty.

skip the paper, watch the words appear

blank paper: a canvas?
can i scribble and make words appear..
can i have this?

can i have a dilemma, that will
in the end save my life..
be the air supply..
to every crack i slipped in,
and watch separate, then fixate itself back to..

back to life?
resuscitate, negotiate..
the reason as to why.
unsecured like a bank account without a pin.
this pointless chatter, never really mattered,
i got you to care about what i have to say, to read it.


pointless words these days always seem to win.

keep talking

stimulation in the mind,
takes its place in the decissions of the soul.
in the choices i refuse to know,
in the situation where i chose to say no...
i cannot blame the intoxicant, but rather the blood that flows
because if stitches mend deep cuts, then the ice in my heart mends my blows,
the blows in transcripts i meant the cheap shot..
that was taken, i guess it serves as deserved, and you deserve
what you got..
so ive gotten as far as im getting,
and ive persued what was decided to be letting..
me free.
i am no longer held by the ropes and chains that held down
the rage emotions, et espirit..
pronounce the words of my tongue like they should...
because with the appropriate accent..
my stage of words is understood.

the platform on which i stand,
and the words people choose to make of me,
when they have never taken the time to stop and ask me personally
do you know me?
did you ever even try
or did the words that cut deep, that formed every lie..
feel better?

did they satisfy, your thirst..

to say every rumor that was ever made about me,
dont feel flattered,
because you were never the first.
i stand in a room of shadows because no one
ever turns on a light,

they rather hide in the dark and continue talking..
matching deaf words to empty faces..

i guess will always be my fight..
keep talking

give and take

hello hello hello,
so its been a while i know
but you know school gets busy and all..
and sometimes.
you just dont have time.
but today im going to share a piece that
will surely brighten your spirits

i awake to find him smiling,
to feel the air between my fingers move
breezing in and out, up and through
i can taste last nights sweet memory, it sits on the curve around my lips
and then he opens his eyes, see that i remember this memory and replaces it like this..
he never left when i was sleeping,
he never chose to walk out my bedroom door,
he stayed and laid and with nothing paid, did not expect to receive more
he did not push to get the full limits, and the pressure was that of feathers
and my heart only beats as fast as the tears drip, as once said by many; he makes me better
i cannot strive for more then what i am taking.
i cannot expect to be exploited because i wont..
and i go to question why it is he loves me but his fingers shush me explaining dont
he never has to say it, he refuses under conditions because the preliminary excuses and uses cannot be made to be a a contradiction. he leaves it at "it is what it is" just know that you are different, the one i can see my life heading into the one i can see myself having kids with.
it is a give and take, an unsigned understood agreement,
and out of all bounds and rules and regulations.. even when signed to something official..
i never received this treatment.
we call it a give and take not a standard set of relations.. because that what the others were not relationships, but relations.. on desired occasion.

its a give and take,
an unwritten understood agreement,
and there are no claims even though i consider myself his;
nothing matches his treatment.

let it be know, its a give and take.