finding that spark.

good evening,
hows everyone?
im hoping yall are doing well.

tonight i thought to myself..
i have the drive to write right now..
but i dont have the spark to find what it is i want to discuss.
i feel a creative outburst bubbling inside me,
but when i start typing, its like verbal throwup.
it comes out messy. i force myself to a topic then it comes out the wrong way.

what does it take to be a good writer?
what do my pieces need to provoke the reader to catch a feeling,
that cannot be described? when someone reads my writing
i want them to be so taken aback by what im saying
that selfishly [on my part] the whole point of what im saying..
could be forgotten, but that feeling of reading something meaningful
sufficed you.
is it like saying..
-you want to go swimming and not get wet?
because the words being the water you indulged yourself in yet
the moisture didnt over power you? thats what weak writing is.
its going swimming with out getting wet.
if you cannot indulge yourself in what you are putting yourself into,
what is the point of indulging in the first place?

it's about finding that spark.
you dont just wack two sticks together and boom, you have fire.
it takes a spark, an ignation.

something to sprout from.
its a paradox within another paradox.
a paradox is something that doesnt make sense.
so even though a paradox is something obscured..
cant meaningless writing be a paradox?
because it doesnt make sense to write if there is no feeling in it.
it doesnt make sense.
a paradox.
paradox writing.

the point behind this very entry..
is it paradox writing?

-or did some where deep inside of you,
did some sort of feeling,
or emotion get aroused.
did i rpovoke thought?
*because if so i accomplished something,
and i guess i found my spark.